“Ello, my name is Jacque. I love to cycle. My friends Valerie, Tristan and I were summoned by a crazy English Lord under the false pretense that he was having a French themed party, including cheeses, wine and onion soup. He told us to wear our most stereotypical national dress, something we would never usually find us in at all. When we got to the chateaux we were rounded up and placed in a cage to be presented to his sweetheart. What a disgrace! However, we did get some fine French cheese, wine and onion soup as compensation so it was not a total waste and we were released back into the wild 10 days later.